Precious Wonders

dear diary, lots of things happened today..from me failin both my calculus and physics test to me gettin 300 bucks to me feelin very excited to write this blog. This blog is gonna be more of a tribute than just another daily event in my life.today i did my physics and calculus test..it was super hard and i feel bad about not studyin long enough..even though i may have not slept in 2 days, i keep feelin guilty about not startin my revision days ago..The physics test wasnt as easy as it looked. Sure the formulas were quite easy to remember but to apply it to the question was very difficult and its somethin i have to overcome by the time i get to the Finals..But Calculus..well where can i even begin? In the exam hall, i sat in the very front seat(the place where you cant cheat because the invigilator is right on ur ass)..so there i was, in my grey sweater and my navy green baggy pants and white adidas, lookin around at the other kids who were answerin the questions confidently and easily as if it was 2+2..i was soo out of ideas and my brain wasnt functionin well...the guy next to me tried to look at my paper..i shook my head and mouthed 'no fuckin way' because theres indeed no fuckin way hes gonna get a right answer by lookin at my paper..so i kinda did him a favor..hahaha i was scribblin on the question paper and practin drawin a face i remember so well whereever i go. it was a face of a girl, whom i keep thinkin about everytime im not talkin to someone. She's so sweet with her perfect smile, her lovely eyes and her cute nose..It'd be quite embarassin if she had seen the drawin that i made because it was soo horribly drawn..i guess im not good when it comes to drawin people's face...but i dont care, cause that way she'll only appear in my head..every now and then i laugh softly like a loser when i think about her. To me, shes the most beautiful angel ive ever seen. No words can describe how i feel about her. She's so special to me, my more than friend. I keep picturin her in my head..
Minutes pass as I did nothin but think about this girl. Why cant i find someone like her in Malaysia..shes one of a kind. I looked at the clock on the wall and it says 5pm...15 more minutes till the test finishes. I started panickin in a way because I know i'm gonna fail this test therefore theres gonna be consequences. My dads gonna kill me, moms gonna cut down my allowance..im gonna be in a lot of shit. but then i looked down on my answer booklet and i saw the face that i had drawn earlier; i felt relieved and happy in a way. I no longer feel scared cause whenever i think about her, i feel calm. She's the only one that can make me happy. When the clock finally strikes 5:15pm, the invigilators took our answer booklet away and ordered us to leave the hall in a civilised manner...on the whole, i did only 3 out of 7 questions which was not that bad i guess because i chose to do the questions with the most points..on my way out, everyone was talkin about how hard and how stressful the test was..i just smiled because as stupid as i was in dreamin about her for almost the whole hour, i never regret one second of it..i guess you can say that this is the day i realise how important she is to me. Ill always love her

Wherever you are, this one is for you..

-Haz

Tuesday, 20th of January 09!

alright so i just got back from the library a couple of hours ago.. it was rainin quite hard so i had to run quickly to the bus stop while coverin my head with the two books that i just borrowed....theyre quiet interestin and i kno that because ill be fillin my head with it for the next two weeks..i wont spoil the title of the books just yet, as it will probably ruin the point of this blog haha..apparently, ever since Uniten officially opened their big-ass library (which i think was like more than 10 years ago or so), i was actually the first person to check the two books out from it believe it or not! how honored was i, not to mention happy too, to actually be the first person in the history of Uniten to open the pages of these books! you may deem me romantic, but the truth is, i feel quite angry with the fact that noone in uniten cares about the two books..these are just two of the many books that i believe can actually change your life and the way you see things..the fact that i found them hangin on the shelf at the very back corner has got to be destiny..i wasnt suppose to be there in the first place..i went to the library because a friend of mine lost his keys there..so i say to myself, since i'm near the library, why not help him look for his keys? so off i went to look for it..i didnt find it unfortunately..even asked the security people if they had found a missin key..they said no so i went to the third floor of the library in hope to find it myself..thats when i saw the chart on one of the shelves..it shows the many topics that the library has books on and how happy was i when i saw LITERATURE at the very bottom! i headed to the place where they have books on Literature and started lookin for familiar names..i saw many crappy books by crappy authors..they even have The Great Gatsby in Malay! fuck u kno! then i saw the books that caught my attention..
'An Introduction to Modern European Literature from Romanticism to Postmodernism' by Martin Travers and 'Literature; An Introduction to Reading and Writing' by Edgar V. Roberts and Henry E. Jacobs...words cant describe how grateful i was that im studyin in uniten! if i was studyin in UIA or UITM, im pretty sure i wouldnt have found books like these there..straight away i went to the counter and asked the pretty lady if i can borrow these two books..she said 'wow ur the first person to borrow this!' i smiled and gave her my id card..she gave me two weeks to finish them and i'm ok with that! so then i walked out, proudly holdin the two books instead of puttin them in the bag..i didnt want to ruin the covers of it..i am to protect it at all cost! these are the books that will get me thinkin so creatively and so 'out of the box', just like im used to when i was in Qatar..
so there u go, this may have been one of the most boring blogs that u have read in ur boring life, but meh..i dont care, i'm happy and im sooo gonna start readin them as soon as i finish my physics and calculus test, which are on friday...

-Haz :)